As I have proceeded through 17 years of having CFS, I have encountered more and more individuals who also suffer from this terrible disease. I have had conversations with people who struggle to have the will to keep going even one more day, seen videos of people who cannot roll over in bed or even speak, people who have not left their homes for decades or have had to move from one home to another year after year because of financial dilemmas that have resulted from this disabling illness. Chronic Fatigue Syndrome is among the cruelest of diseases. There are no words to capture how it takes that moment where the train goes off the tracks, crashing into the earth in flames and makes that moment every moment of your life.
All of this is terrifying to an undefinable degree, but what is most amazing to an equally undefinable degree, is that these same people are consistently the kindest, most generous, caring people I have ever encountered. I see people reach out to others they have never even met with the care and love of a parent or a partner. I see a connection and sense of community, where we are all acknowledging one another's brilliant and bright existence, outside and in spite of this illness. I don't know if CFS simply strikes the bright and the kind, or if the experience makes us so. Regardless, I wanted to share this with all of you who have CFS, and also those of you who don't and may not have the privilege of bearing witness to this community of humanitarians.
A final thought. It strikes me in my heart whenever I hear of another person with CFS that this sort of thing isn't supposed to happen to angels.
But it does.
Millions of them.
And as an angel would, these people gracefully spread their wings and continue to fly about the earth doing what angels do.