Thursday, February 10, 2011

What do you do when you are too sick to do anything.

I have had CFS for 16 years and more than anything, I think it is a challenge of endurance. I have taken up full time employment in being happy. I ask myself throughout the day, what will make me feel even a wee bit better? and that's what I do. I have a million hobbies that come and go. It's different for everyone, what brings you joy, but I do feel it is essential. It takes the spirit of a warrior to carry on under such circumstances. 
a bit of writing.
a work in progress of course...

I am in fierce pursuit of joy.
I write.
I paint.
I play guitar
and then I don't for months and months.
Sometimes it just looks too heavy over there
propping itself up against the wall.

I share my story
I believe that purpose can be made of all of this suffering.
I photograph my chickens as each finds her way to bed at sunset.
They make me laugh.
They know how important it is
to remember that life is not so serious.

Somedays, it's still hard.
Of course it is.

Other days, I plant a fresh crop of arugula
curl up in a sleeping bag 

on the backyard bench
and see the water colored sky
over the puddles on the nasturtium
and know that rarely have I been better.

3 comments:

  1. Hey!
    I am wondering if you might like to contribute some of your art to my Art 4 XMRV project? You can find all the details on my blog here - http://cfsngay.blogspot.com/2011/01/art-4-xmrv.html

    Cheers :)
    Lee Lee

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  2. I know the fierce pursuit of joy, but have lately given up a little. Thanks for the reminder.

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  3. Fierce pursuit of joy: Yes.

    I am the Sarah who just sent you an add request on facebook by the way - I wanted to kinda intro myself over here too, although my blog is rather neglected.

    I love your poetry.

    ReplyDelete